I always asked him when he would come home (RO)

1. Respondent ID
1. 1. Age: 10
1. 2. Sex: M.
1. 3. Parent(s) away: Father.
1. 4. Parent(s) moved abroad: 11-12 years ago
1. 5. Country: Spain.
1. 6. Respondent lives with: Mother.

2. Details of Respondent’s life before:
I: How long was he out of the country?
R: About three or four months. Then he used to come for a month… then he left again…
I: Your father lives with you now.
R: Yes.
I: He has returned this year.
R: Yes.
I: What month was it when he came back, if you remember…?
R: …
I: You were born when he was still abroad.
R: Right.
I: What did you like to do with him when he came home?
R: Stay with him, go out with him.
I: Where were you going, to the Crâng Park?
R: Yes.
I: Which is your favorite park? Is it Crâng?
R: Yes.
I: What about Marghiloman Park, don’t you like it?
R: I go there with my colleagues.
I: I see. So, you gave different parks to go to; with your father to one park, with your colleagues to another park. Do you have many friends?
R: Yes, I do.
I: Are they your age, older or younger?
R: My age. We are classmates.
I: What do you all do in the park?
R: We play football… that’s all.
I: Great.
R: We run.
I: Do you play football with your father?
R: (He shakes his head.)
I: You don’t? Doesn’t he like to play? What about other games in the open?
R: I don’t play too much with Dad.
I: You don’t?
R: No.
I: You just walk.
R: Yes.
I: Would you like to play with him?
R: Yes.
I: Did you ask him to?
R: (He laughs. He whispers.) Yes.
I: Did he say “I’m too serious for that”? Or why doesn’t he play?
R: Because he is tired.
I: That’s how my parents were, too, believe me, always tired. Who helped you with your homework?
R: My mother.
I: In what subjects? The ones which seemed more difficult to you?
R: Science, civic education.
I: Did your mother help you in math?
R: Yes, she did.
I: Do you have any favorite subject?
R: Yes.
I: Which is that?
R: Math.
I: Who accompanied you to school? Is your school near your house?
R: It’s near my house, I go alone.
I: How old were you when you started going to school alone?
R: Eight.
I: Who used to talk to your teacher?
R: Mom.
I: Only your mother? Your father…
R: Sometimes he did. He didn’t want to come with me.
I: Why didn’t he want to?
R: (He laughs.)

3. Details of Respondent’s life before:
I: Can you tell me anything about your father’s leaving? Just one moment… Can you tell about how you used to say good bye? What happened that day?
R: I don’t actually remember.
I: Something more recent… which usually happened on the day before his departure?
R: I was tagging along with him.
I: Did you use to stay inside or to go out?
R: Both inside and outside.
I: Did you also use to do any other thing together?
R: … I used to throw my arms around him. Mom had to leave, too. But not abroad, she went to Bucharest. She worked in a hospital in Bucharest. And I remained home with Grandma. And I also missed her a lot but I knew she was busy.
I: By the way, did you understand why your father had to leave the country?
R: Yes, I did. He went to work.
I: What did you feel about that? Did it seem a good reason for him to leave?
R: Both good and bad.
I: Why? Why good and why bad?
R: It was good because he used to bring us presents. It was bad because he had to leave again. He stayed far away too long.
I: Right. Your mother took care of you, didn’t she?
R: Yes.
I: Anybody else?
R: No.
I: How did you get along with her while your father was away?
R: Fine.
I: Do you also have other relatives in town or in the country?
R: My cousin also looked after me.
I: And how did you get along with your cousin?
R: Quite well. We used to play.
I: She is playful. How old is she?
R: Fifty five.
I: What did you play?
R: I was younger at that time. We played with small cars. I was younger when Mom was at… at Drăgaica fair.
I: What toy cars did you play with?
R: I don’t know, there were some small cars, like this… it wasn’t me who bought them.
I: Did your father give them to you?
R: Yes.
I: What else did he send you?
R: He sent me a tractor when I was younger. I rode it a lot.
I: A tractor you could ride?
R: Yes, that kind of tractor with pedals.
I: Really?
R: Yes, and I’ve got an ATV, too.
I: You don’t say! Do you know how much I wished one when I was a kid? Where did you ride your ATV and tractor?
R: I rode the tractor behind the building and the ATV in Tineretului Park.
I: I envy you! Any other things, besides these big items, did he also use to send you?
R: Toy cars, rollers, a penny board.
I: What’s that?
R: Kind of skateboard.
I: I see. What about sweets?
R: Yes, he also sent me sweets.
I: What kind of sweets?
R: …
I: Who knows? Do you like lollipops, chocolate?
R: Chocolate.
I: Milk chocolate? What else?
R: I don’t know, but I remember he used to bring some white chocolate.
I: I like milk chocolate best. It’s my favorite. But these are my own tastes. While you father was away, did you ever need a doctor or did you go in hospital?
R: No, I didn’t.
I: Great! Do you have any friends whose parents have also moved abroad to work?
R: Yes, I do.
I: To what countries?
R: Germany.
I: Do you feel closer to them? Is it a special relationship with these friends whose parents are out of the country? Looking at your face, I guess you don’t. You don’t feel closer to them. You don’t have certain common subjects to talk about.
R: No.
I: Your friends know your father is abroad, don’t they?
R: Yes, they do.
I: And what do they think about that?
R: (he makes a long pause.) They have never told me what they think.
I: Haven’t they?
R: No, they only asked me.
I: They didn’t say “wow, you’re so lucky you’ve got an ATV”?
R: (he laughs.)
I: What does your mother do here? What did she use to do while your father was away?
R: What did she do? She worked at Drăgaică, she was… used to give…
I: Do you know what your father did in Spain, what job she had?
R: No, I don’t.
I: Didn’t you ask him?
R: He told me he was working in an office.
I: Weren’t you curious to know more about that?
R: …
I: Ok… he used to send presents….
R: …he did …sometimes, but he usually brought them to us.
I: Was there anything special you wanted him to buy you with the money earned working abroad?
R: No.
I: Have you ever asked him to buy you something?
R: What? Well, eh… a drone.
I: A drone? Did he buy it to you! I would also like to buy a drone. I want one with a longer lifecycle. What was the lifecycle of your drone?
R: Between ten and fifteen minutes.
I: Do you film from above?
R: I don’t know how to switch on the camera.
I: Do you play with at as if it were a helicopter like that…
R: Yes, I do.
I: Have you had any trouble with your neighbors because of it?
R: No, I haven’t. Yet
I: Yet. I’ve heard about a drone which had run into the prop of a plane, which is not good. The plane didn’t crash, but…

4. Internet-based communications.
*Technical.
I: Do you have internet access at home?
R: I do.
I: What do you use for that, a computer, a tablet, a laptop…?
R: A laptop.
I: Have you got your own laptop?
R: Yes.
I: Since when?
R: Last year.
I: How did you access the internet before?
R: At that time I used to go out with my friends.
I: Oh, you didn’t feel the need to sit at a computer. Ok. Who bought you the laptop?
R: Mom did.
I: Did you use to talk to your father on the laptop?
R: No, we talked over the phone.
I: Did you use to write letters?
R: I didn’t.
I: Did he use to write you and your mother?
R: No, he didn’t.
I: Do you talk to your friends and colleagues on the internet?
R: Sure.
I: What programs do you use?
R: Skype.
I: Skype! What about video call?
R: Yes, video, too.
I: Do you prefer the video?
R: Not me, they prefer it.
I: Do you shut off the camera?
R: Yes.
I: Why?
R: …
I: I don’t like to be seen, either. I understand why you shut off the camera: “look, I don’t want you to see me. I haven’t combed my hair”. Do you know what I mean?
R: I do.
I: Is that why you don’t turn it on?
R: (he laughs lightly)
I: Do you also use only the voice call through Skype? It has this option, too.
R: No, we don’t.
I: What about the chat? Do you write?
R: Yes, we do
I: You haven’t got Facebook.
R: I’ve got it.
I: Have you? You know that’s illegal. What age did you say you were?
R: Over twenty. Yes, twenty.
I: What do you like to do on Facebook?
R: I don’t go on it too often.
I: What about Messenger?
R: ….
I: Did you want to talk to your father on Skype?
R: Yes, I did.
I: What did you tell him? “Dad, I want to talk on Skype!”
R: Yes, but he forgot his password.
I: Oh, that’s why you didn’t go on it… What about other services, like Google Hangouts… do you have it on your phone?
R: What?
I: Google Hangouts, I don’t know if you use that.
R: No, I don’t.
I: Do your parents have a Facebook account?
R: Only Mom has.
I: Well… does she follow you on Facebook? Oh, you don’t actually post pn it.
R: No, I only have a photo.
I: How do you prefer to communicate with your father?
R: Over the phone.
I: Was it you that usually called, I mean you and your mother, or he called you?
R: Either me or him…
I: Who do you think called more often?
R: He did.

*Content.
I: How often did you talk every day?
R: Two or three times a day.
I: You have got your phone for a long time, haven’t you?
R: For two years and a half.
I: What did you usually talk about?
R: I always asked him when he would come home. And he always said “I got a little bit left”, but he had much left. He had one or two months left. After a week I asked him again when he would come.
I: I believe you. I also have flashbacks from my childhood. Would you have liked to talk more often r more seldom or you think you talked often enough?
R: It was often enough.
I: Did he use to ask you what you would have liked him to bring you?
R: Yes, he did.
I: As you told me, you used to ask him to bring you certain things. Ok, that was a sufficient communication. Was there anybody around while you talked to him?
R: No.
I: How did you talk to him when you were younger? Also individually or your mother was around?
R: Mom was around.
I: Were there any relatives, or friends who used to come to your place?
R: No.
I: Were there any things you felt you could only discuss with your father, but not with your mother or sister?
R: I don’t know.
I: have you ever felt you cannot tell him something on the phone and have to tell him face-to-face?
R: o, I haven’t.
I: Did he use to ask you what you had done at school?
R: No, he didn’t.
I: Were you pressed by anybody to get good marks? But you are not actually given marks, are you? You are graded…
R: Yes.
I: Do your grades matter for your parents?
R: Yes, they do.
I: Really? Have they ever scolded you because you weren’t graded highly?
R: Highly?
I: Yes, highly.
R: No, they haven’t.
I: Do you like school?
R: Yes, I do.
I: Has your father ever scolded you when you talked over the phone?
R: No, he hasn’t.
I: Has he scolded you face-to-face?
R: (He nods.)
I: Really? Why? Can you tell me?
R: When I was younger…
I: What had you done?
R: I hid from him. (We both laugh.)
I: Why did you hide from him?
R: Because… it was a sudden…
I: How old were you?
R: Three or four.
I: Where had you hidden?
R: (He laughs.) In a wardrobe.
I: Had you stayed there long?
R: I don’t know.
I: It means you had scared him a bit, did he scold you? “Where’s the boy?” Have you ever lost them while you were walking on the street?
R: Yes, I have.
I: Really?
R: I was walking with Mom and Dad and I turned left to another.. street. And I thought they were walking behind me. We only found each other after a while.

5. Relationship with the absent parent (important stages/significant moments):
I: Have you ever gone to your father’s place abroad?
R: Where?
I: Where he was working.
R: No, I haven’t.
I: Weren’t you curious to see the place?
R: Oh, yes, I was.
I: Did you tell him you wanted to go there?
R: I did.
I: And what did he say?
R: He said it was impossible.
I: Why? Did he explain why?
R: No, he didn’t.
I: No?
R. No. People get it from me. If Mom says no, I ask: “But why?”
I: You don’t need to take my point… Did you know where he lived there abroad?
R: No, I didn’t.
I: Did you ask him to tell about the place he lived in?
R: He only told me he lived with his colleagues.
I: Did he tell you what the sight was from the window, if there was a park nearby?
R: No.
I: Did he tell you how things were going there?
R: No.
I: Could you point those places on the map?
R: No.
I: You will learn at Geography… Did your mother tell you about the work your father was doing?
R: She didn’t really say.
I: Did you ask her?
R: (He laughs and shakes his head.)
I: You didn’t? Ok. Where there any things you were trying to hide from your father?
R: No.
I: Did you call him when you were sad?
R: I did.
I: Really? Why did you usually call him, for what purpose? Did you have anything special to tell him?
R: Not really.
I: If a colleague gave you any trouble, did you feel the need to tell your father?
R: No, I didn’t.
I: Do you use WhatsApp?
R: No.
I: What about Instagram?
R: No.
I: Do your colleagues use them?
R: They do.
I: Really? Why don’t you install them?
R: Because I don’t stay too much on Messenger or WhatsApp…
I: Is it because you don’t want or you are not allowed to?
R: No, I don’t want. I’d rather go out; from three to eight-eight thirsty.
I: Do you only stay in the park?
R: Oh, no… we also go for walks…
I: Do you like riding a bike?
R: Yes, I do.
I: Where?
R: In the country.
I: Don’t you ride it in the town?
R: No, I don’t.
I: You are afraid of cars, aren’t you?
R: I don’t have my bike here, it’s at the place we have in the country
I: Thank you very much.